Sunday, December 16, 2012

From Newtown to Your Town

The slaughter of 26 young children and school employees at Sandy Hook Elementary School in Newtown, Conn., last Friday reminds us again that, sadly, we need to be prepared to counter violence in our home towns, in public spaces, in our workplaces. Tips for protecting yourself from workplace violence are covered here. Clearly, we need more than defensive mechanisms to offset these horrific happenings.

Here’s what I think I know about those random acts of violence in Newtown: The killer was “off,” maybe autistic, apparently a nerd, definitely a loser. He came from a broken home. No one seems to know what his mother did for a living, but now the world is aware that she shot guns as a hobby. News reports seem to imply that this family was fractured by more than a divorce. Siblings seem not to have seen each other for years. No one seems to be able to provide details about whether and to what extent the killer received help, about whether his mother was crazy too, about whether she was capable of providing the help he clearly needed.

No one seems to have known these two people, the killer and his mother, living in a neighborhood. What did the killer do after graduating from high school? What had he been doing since? How did the mother make her living? How did the mother deal with her off son? Did she deny the seriousness of the problem? Did anyone know how bad it was for this kid?

These sad events are already triggering renewed interest in gun control and in curbing violence in films and video games. What they should inspire is a new interest in community. Whether you’re a lawyer or not, working in a law firm or not, get to know your neighbors. Talk to the geeky staff person at the office party. Reach out to the snotty legal secretary with whom you clearly have nothing in common. Find a commonality. Away from your office, in your neighborhood, do the same. Learn more. Talk more. Who is hurting? Who needs help? Who might benefit from just a little bit of interest shown? In your social circle, don’t just stick to your kind, the people who are the same, with the same interests, the same sorts of families, the same income levels. Extend yourself. Give. Be kind to the loner in the neighborhood who seems not to have a friend in the world. A few minutes of pleasantries might spare the world another massacre.

—Lori Tripoli

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